School is officially back in session, and if you’re in college or university, it’s time to hit the books (or, you know, Google) and get into study mode. But we all know that partying and pranks are also part of the college or uni experience, and students need to destress from time to time. The important part is to party and prank responsibly – or you might face criminal charges.
York Regional Police recently released an “expense list” advising students to “party with caution” as O-week and classes get started on post-secondary campuses across Ontario. The list details potential consequences for breaking the law while you’re at school.
From climbing a crane to detonating a stink bomb in the air duct, you could face thousands of dollars in fines, several years in jail, or even both. There are consequences for breaking the law, and you might want to memorize them just like your study notes for biology.
So, either keep your nose in your books (or your screen, typing up essays and whatnot), or party with caution.
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These charges are based on the Criminal Code, the Highway Traffic Act, and municipal bylaws, according to police, however, some figures may vary based on circumstances.
Just a note that there were some terms unfamiliar to us on this list, so we’ve provided informative Urban Dictionary links where necessary…click with caution.
Here’s York Regional Police’s Frosh Week “expense list” that extends to the rest of the year, as well. These 26 actions range in charges from $65 to 14 years in jail, so remember – if you’re caught, it may cost you!
1. Climbing a crane: up to two years in jail, $5,000, or your life
2. Flashing the Google Maps car: up to six months in jail, $5,000
3. Tossing a beer on the field during the next Jays’ loss: up to two years in jail, $5,000, your career
4. Sliding a lemon glacier under the neighbour’s door: up to two years in jail, $5,000
5. Housing a gator in your dorm room tub: bylaw offence depending on municipality
6. Using ‘roids to improve your gym selfie: up to 18 months in jail, $1,000, health defects
7. Playing Edward Fortyhands in the student centre: $125 and your stomach contents
8. Jacking someone’s Starbucks mobile order: up to two years in jail, $5,000
9. Creepy clowning at the “It” movie premiere: $65
10. Shutting down the highway with your motorcycle mob: up to five years in jail, $5,000
11. Trashing an AirBnB: up to 10 years in jail, $5,000, your security deposit
12. Fake GoFundMe account for friend who isn’t really dying: up to 14 years in jail
13. Kidnapping a rival team’s mascot: minimum of five years in jail
14. Filming a rooftopping video from a skyscraper: $65, a severe talking to from your mom, or your life
15. Lighting flares at the frosh concert: $65
16. Stealing a llama from the zoo: up to 10 years in jail, $5,000
17. Performing an “oil change” to make the varsity team: likely expulsion and a UTI
18. Life sciences wing slip’n’slide: $65
19. Faking a kidnapping: up to five years in jail
20. Rigging dorm room laundry machines to do laundry for free: up to two years in jail, $5,000
21. Netflix and chill without consent: up to 10 years in jail, $5,000, no chill
22. Microwaving your roommate’s fidget spinner: up to two years in jail, $5,000
23. Tag swapping for better deals at Saks: up to six months in jail, $5,000
24. Dump a mattress in the school pool: up to two years in jail, $5,000
25. Smoking the devil’s lettuce (marijuana) before summer 2018: up to $1,000
26. Detonating a stink bomb in the air duct: up to two years in jail, $5,000
Students should note the disclaimer at the bottom of the poster, which is meant to be informative about possible consequences, and not taken as a legal document.
Lighting flares, “creepy clowning,” and setting up a slip’n’slide are the lowest charges at $65 apiece, with 14 years in jail for creating a fake GoFundMe for a friend who isn’t really dying at one of the worst charges on the list.
Let’s not forget about the severe talking to from your mom from #14, which likely applies to every item on this list.
These are not to be taken lightly – the tongue-in-cheek list is an annual campaign, reminding students to be safe as they go back to school.
Check out the original poster here.